Pick Up the Box

May 26

The crew hits the Sibylen exosite to rescue Froggy, Vera, and the other auction survivors from the Void Cultists. What they find inside is worse than expected.

Two days from now, Brian drops his SWN Rules Explained on the warrior class, don't miss it!

Meet the Crew:

Jeff as Star Master (Game Master)
Brian as Captain Thorn
Stephanie as the warrior Haley
Doja as the wildcard pilot Robert
Scott as the transhuman hacker Felix

[00:00:01] Jeff: welcome to the dark star adventure cast where the only thing standing between you and the black is your ship and the strength of your crew void help us all even as a little zombie froggy still clucks i'm gonna create a chain of possible chaos come on no one's allowed to treat froggy like that except for us well you certainly would and i shoved my foot through his chest oh my god
[00:00:33] Star Master Jeff: We are back. I'm sure everyone loved the last episode where the crew escaped their own spaceship. Oh, God, what a pain in the ass. yep and then felix somehow bricked the whole ship oh my god i was in a chair the entire time for all of our listeners at home that may not remember what happened last time i'd like to bring back what i think is now our most popular segment stephanie tries to explain what happened last episode but this time we're going to time box it and you're going to have 60 seconds you're not actually leaving this season are you oh this is a problem you have 60 seconds and go what happened last session
[00:01:11] Haleyy: Yeah, Robert and I decided to chase after a cat because we're very concerned that Froggy is not taking care of that adorable creature. And guess what? We did find the cat. There were a lot of other things going on, by the way, outside of Robert and I trying to go and find the cat. But we did find Robert's boot knife, some Loki fun cards, and an orange juice box. Yeah, that he had destroyed. That's not on Hayley's plate anymore. That was Percy, the orange juice thing. So while that was happening for Robert and I outside the ship, the cultists decided to activate their antenna, enslave or unhollow everyone else that was at the auction. And now we've got to go save them. But we do have Robert's boot knife back. So I think this is achievable.
[00:02:03] Star Master Jeff: Buzz. It's funny to hear what was important to Stephanie. the cat punching through a hole or you know blowing up a cultist ship we spent 30 seconds of that 60 seconds talking about the cat and the orange juice the cat the orange juice no mention of thorner felix okay crew this is where you stand the void cultist ship has been shot to shit the antenna that was the fork antenna that was on the front the weird science antenna has been blown to bits One of the people that were inside of the ship, one of the cultists, tried to escape. You blasted him to bits, and you've also torn your way through the hull of your own ship with a fusion torch. You now have an exit from the ship. There is a group of unhallowed innocents being held captive in the exocyte by a group of, let's see, you counted six void cultists. That's not that many. No, it's like a, you know, just a small crew for a ship. It's actually smaller than yours. So you were kind of picking on them by shooting at their ship.
[00:03:12] Thorne: Yeah, I take that.
[00:03:13] Star Master Jeff: Dummies. So that's where it stands right now. You are standing in the cargo bay and you are looking at this hole you just cut into the side of your dear precious scapegoat.
[00:03:21] Felix: that'll be fun to fix like i guess two quick things one we cannot take off until we get a new um yeah owner code whatever it was felix as i said you bricked the ship what i you had one job to victor victor strake bricked the ship thank you very much yeah so we need a new we need a new owner module At the end of last episode, we actually ended up outside of the ship. We put on all our gear. I ran over to check to make sure Dr. Voss had actually been taken by Strake, and she was. She's gone. I'm devastated. Gotta get Doc back. And now we're faced with One Direction to go.
[00:03:59] Star Master Jeff: Your ship and Vera's office are right next to each other, so you rush over and you check to see if Voss is there. She's not. And then you rush back, and you're reporting to the crew right now, and you're all standing in the cargo bay with this hole in the hull, knowing that Froggy and Vera and 12 or 13 other people, including Meer Prust, have all been taken captive.
[00:04:20] Haleyy: Yeah, not only taken captive, though. We have to remember they're also unhallowed, and we have to figure out a way to undo that, too.
[00:04:26] Robert: Yeah, I don't know what the fork's gonna do in terms of their being mind controlled or something. I don't like that. We blew the antenna up, so maybe they're fine now.
[00:04:37] Felix: Maybe they're all fine.
[00:04:38] Haleyy: Oh, I hope so.
[00:04:39] Felix: I really hope that's true.
[00:04:40] Robert: Hayley, how are you feeling? I mean, because again, something's happening here.
[00:04:45] Haleyy: I've been, in my training, one of the things they really were big on was compartmentalizing. So I think I've been doing a pretty good job of that. Since I woke up, it's been pretty crazy. Like, I have this whole other part of my brain that I am still struggling to understand, and that's even separate from the whole unhallowed thing or untethered or whatever the fuck they said. It's a lot, Robert. Thank you, though. I'm holding it together.
[00:05:17] Robert: Hey, good, you got this. As we know, talking about it, Thorne telling us about his mama, you, I mean, we've all shared. Sometimes keeping it in, that's even worse.
[00:05:31] Thorne: Well, for now, let's try to stay focused. If I can keep your energy on this, Haleyy, I promise extra rest, triple orange juice rations, but we gotta do something about this exocyte.
[00:05:42] Haleyy: I like that. I do like triple orange juice rations.
[00:05:46] Felix: And listen, the sooner we figure out what's going on here, the sooner we can get a new ownership module and be after Dr. Voss. So let's put a move on.
[00:05:54] Robert: We can un-brick the ship that you bricked. Let's just go.
[00:05:57] Thorne: All right, let's head over to the exit. Pet the cat.
[00:06:01] Star Master Jeff: Yeah, yeah, good kitty. The cat is winding around the captain's feet.
[00:06:05] Haleyy: What if the cat's on top of an olive?
[00:06:08] Star Master Jeff: Oh, no.
[00:06:09] Robert: No. Yeah, let's keep him in. Let's keep him in here.
[00:06:13] Thorne: Too bad there's a giant hole in the ship now, but maybe he'll just stay. Well, all that's left is the site. I know about two ways to get in. There's the main entrance that we went in the first time and the back exit that we went out. Why don't we go over to the edge of the ridge and take a look and see if there's anyone guarding outside and decide what to do from there. Everybody ready? Sounds good, boss. Yes, captain. My captain.
[00:06:37] Haleyy: Yep, captain.
[00:06:38] Thorne: Flip my cigarette down, stub it out, and beer up. All right, so I've got... Thorne's got his laser pistol in its holster. He's got the laser rifle that he stole from that guy on Wafisa slung over his shoulder, and he leads everybody over towards the ridge that overlooks the exocyte, and then, like, gestures for everybody to get down low and let Robert use his quote-unquote bionic eyes to survey the situation. I'm so happy to whip him out. He just opens his eyes really wide.
[00:07:05] Star Master Jeff: Okay, so you whip out your binoculars. I'm going to need you to roll a notice wisdom. You climb up a little sand dune and you go prone and you peek over the top of it and you survey everything that there is to see.
[00:07:17] Robert: Notice dexterity. wisdom he's doing backflips while he looks around how how quickly can you move your eyes yeah it's he's saying that because he has an 18 dex exactly i'll take that plus two i look real fast um but uh no instead i look uh real not fast oh my because i roll a four
[00:07:42] Star Master Jeff: Okay, so you do notice things because you are using binoculars. So when you look down there, you see that the entire auction tent, which is transparent from the outside, you're looking through that and you see that any of the people that were in there that weren't out on the landing pad did not get turned into unhallowed. That's great. They were, however, butchered by all of the void cultists and they are now dead, laid sprawled all over the inside of the auction tent.
[00:08:09] Thorne: Less than great.
[00:08:10] Star Master Jeff: yeah that's a lot of dead bodies further to what you are assuming is the east because it's to your right at this moment classic you see the entrance to the exo site in front of that entrance is a single void cultist standing guard he has what you think might be a mag rifle but you can't really tell from this distance it could potentially be a laser rifle
[00:08:35] Robert: Guys, we got one tango waiting for us. Felix, can you spot him? What do you think we need to do here? How do we get in?
[00:08:43] Felix: I'm not a soldier, Robert.
[00:08:48] Felix: I mean, you're the door guy. yeah well listen as far as i am concerned we should just go in the front door right because going back into that goo tube who knows what we're gonna pop up into and that was like right in the open so i don't want to risk just popping up in the middle of a group of those cultist guys so like we know the way through i think we just go back through we trace our steps
[00:09:11] Robert: That's, I was going to say, I think you're dead on. We have the environmental advantage. We've been here. We've done it. We know how to get through every door. I'm hoping we can use that, and especially if we can funnel them down by maybe one of those drops or one of those goo tube, we might be able to get the drop on them.
[00:09:36] Thorne: Let's do it. Let's try to take out this one tango, as Robert put it. And don't hesitate. Watch out for the civilians, but these cultists, we can shoot to kill. And then Thorne takes his laser rifle and readies it. Robert, can you take that guy out from here?
[00:09:52] Robert: Yeah, I was hoping you'd take the first shot, but I'll take care of her.
[00:09:57] Thorne: I know you don't want that.
[00:09:58] Star Master Jeff: So you guys are on a small rise about 90 to 100 feet away from this guy. He does have partial cover from the rise of another sand dune as the exocyte is like down a ramp before you get to the entrance. But he's most of the way up that ramp. So you can see only like the top half of his body. that's going to give you a minus two to hit because he's in partial cover if you're using your combat rifle which is your long range weapon that has a range of 100 feet actually so it's still within normal range for you so you don't incur any additional penalties so you just have that minus two for partial cover
[00:10:36] Robert: Oh no, that would be a 10.
[00:10:40] Felix: Listen, listen, listen. I don't want to be the rules. I don't want to be the rules guy.
[00:10:44] Star Master Jeff: I know what he's going to say. I don't really want to guess what he's about to say.
[00:10:48] Robert: By the way, I'm a warrior.
[00:10:50] Star Master Jeff: Is that the rules guy thing?
[00:10:52] Robert: Yeah. That he's a warrior? Yeah. And I am going to decide... It's every episode. ...that I automatically hit. Wait, what? How?
[00:11:01] Star Master Jeff: No, I'm just kidding. Is there a rule for this? Wait, hold on. Rules guy, what's going on? Okay, so you shoot, you miss, but... Oh, shit, you're a warrior, so you automatically hit. So you use your combat rifle, you squeeze off a really careful shot, sighting down your scope right between the eyes.
[00:11:22] Robert: I think it's time we start moving towards the exosite. Nice shot, buddy. Let's do it.
[00:11:27] Star Master Jeff: So you start trudging down the sand dune. It's easier to walk down the sand dune than up or across. Once you get to the bottom and you're kind of sliding down, sand's getting into your boots and you start moving towards the exosite. You start to, like, slide back with every step. You remember, like, ugh, walking on Sibylen just sucks. You already missed the scapegoat. You're yearning for the days of six months in space not having to walk on Sibylen. And Haleyy, you remember your tour of duty here. Back when you were first landing on Sibylen, you told everyone you were here before and how much you fucking hated it. Yeah, still do. This is stinging in your mind how fucking shitty this planet is. What an awful, awful place.
[00:12:05] Haleyy: And I thought, you know, Wafisa was bad, and then I had to do Sibylen again.
[00:12:11] Felix: It's a tour of all the shittiest planets. And as Felix is walking, like, he can just tell the sand's getting in his leg, his metal leg, which is just so annoying. He's just, ugh, I hate sand. It's so coarse and irritating. It just gets everywhere.
[00:12:25] Haleyy: I wish we could have just stayed on scrap jobs. Not really, you guys.
[00:12:29] Thorne: We have work to do, but... Next time we stop, it's going to be at New Hawaii. Yeah.
[00:12:35] Robert: Ooh, new Hawaii. Those turn my bass, my god.
[00:12:39] Haleyy: For sure up on my wall.
[00:12:41] Star Master Jeff: So, your banter continuing. You end up at the top of the ramp at the exo site. You can't see the door yet. I don't want to make that decision for you, but you're off to the side at the top of the ramp.
[00:12:54] Thorne: Okay. All right, everyone. This is it. We don't know who's going to be waiting, but based on the fact that nobody came and dragged this body away, we probably should be good. And then I'll just like peer around the corner towards the doorway and see what I can see. Okay, by peer, you mean you're trying to be sneaky? Yeah, I've got my back to the, like, wall, and then I'm, like, peering my neck around. I got an eight.
[00:13:17] Star Master Jeff: So you peek around, and you see the dead body has rolled down the dune and then slid down the ramp about halfway. The door at the bottom is, of course, wide open. Inside, you can see the antechamber, where there's a little bit of a hallway and then the goo cake on the wall, where you have to stick your hand into it and manipulate the inner door. So you can't see the goo cake, you don't see any guard or anyone else. You can hear the reverberating sound of things being shuffled and moved about. You hear the voice of a woman saying something, but you can't quite make it out. But there's definitely some loud activity going on in there.
[00:13:58] Thorne: They're doing something in there. It's unfortunate that we wasted as much time as we did. Who knows what they were able to accomplish? But I think this is our chance to move up. Haleyy and Robert, you two take point.
[00:14:07] Haleyy: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Crack my knuckles and walk to the front of the group.
[00:14:12] Thorne: and we're going to move, like, past the guy who's down towards the main entrance, and obviously we want to get towards the goo cake that lets you manipulate the inner door, but I think that we need to first be careful that nobody can see us doing that, so we're going to have to just, like, take the antechamber carefully. So I'll leave you two to it.
[00:14:32] Star Master Jeff: Okay, so if just the two of you are moving forward, go ahead and roll your sneak dexterity.
[00:14:38] Haleyy: Oh, boy.
[00:14:40] Star Master Jeff: Mm-hmm. Dexterity, yay!
[00:14:43] Robert: Sneak boo. Oh, seven. And I rolled a nine.
[00:14:47] Star Master Jeff: So you begin to carefully make your way down the ramp. Robert, as you're passing the man who you slaughtered like a pig, you were right. It is a mag rifle. So bully to you. Great notice check. Also, if you had rolled a higher notice check, you would have seen this earlier, but the man has a half-eaten protein bar. Yeah, so good. Dust off the sand.
[00:15:12] Thorne: Robert, don't eat that.
[00:15:14] Robert: Sorry, it's gone.
[00:15:15] Thorne: I look over at Felix. I'm like, God, it's like having a dog.
[00:15:19] Star Master Jeff: And you carefully begin to make your way into the antechamber. You flank the doorway. You peek inside. You've already made your sneak checks. Whether you succeeded or not is still to be seen. When you're at the bottom of the ramp, peeking into the antechamber, you can see straight through into the goo pool room. I should have thought of a better name for that room. And in there... You can see that there are several unhallowed. You can see just different helpers, bodyguards, employees of the auction all moving around like zombies, carrying boxes, pulling things out. Those tanks from the other room, they seem to have disconnected some of them. They've moved them into this room and they're carrying them back and forth or they're emptying the water out and stuff like that. From this angle, you can't see the ghoul pool itself, and you can't see where all of those jars are either. You just see a straight line into that room for, like, 50 feet, and then there's a wall, and all these people are shuffling back and forth. You do not see any void cultists, though you do hear a voice. A woman's voice rings out across, and now that you're a little bit closer, you can make out a little bit of what she's saying. She's obviously around a corner somewhere, but you hear snippets saying, "'No?' You put that down there." You? Go pick that up? This right here, you idiot? Move it over there. God, working with these dumb unhallowed, I can't wait till we get back to civilized space and I can simply hire the people necessary. No, not there! You almost got me on my foot, you dumbass! Anyway, that's the little snippet that you hear. And then she seems to walk off and you can hear her continue to berate the poor brainwashed peoples of Sibylen.
[00:16:53] Haleyy: Robert, that's awful.
[00:16:54] Robert: yeah um rude damn right also bad news that we destroyed the the antenna and they're all still unhallowed yeah i wonder if uh i haven't heard not bark orders adam might uh might help us out but i don't know what are you thinking
[00:17:15] Haleyy: I think it looks like it might be safe to wave the other guys in here.
[00:17:19] Robert: Yeah, let's do that.
[00:17:23] Haleyy: We don't see any cultists, but I wonder if she's untethered too, because I remember back on Scrapjack, I wonder if I can order these guys around.
[00:17:35] Thorne: Ooh, that's an interesting question.
[00:17:36] Haleyy: Because she's yelling at them and commanding them to do things. If she's untethered,
[00:17:42] Felix: I'm worried how much, how focused Haleyy has been these past episodes on controlling people.
[00:17:48] Star Master Jeff: It's not only that, but Haleyy has a sixth intelligence and she's using all two of her neurons on this one.
[00:17:56] Thorne: All right, so are you guys waving us down? Like, what's the... All right, so once we get the all clear, we'll go past the downed cultist and move towards the sides of the door where they're flanking. Felix, roll sneak dexterity, please. Just me?
[00:18:11] Haleyy: The rest of us already did.
[00:18:14] Felix: I roll the six.
[00:18:15] Haleyy: And I tell them what the woman had been saying, that they're moving some stuff around in there. She's calling the unhallowed dumb.
[00:18:23] Thorne: These people are enthralled, so I can understand why she would say that, but it's still rude. Very rude.
[00:18:28] Haleyy: I feel I share a common expression with them at times.
[00:18:32] Thorne: Make sure you both check your fire. We don't know who's what, unless it's obviously a cultist. Be careful.
[00:18:39] Star Master Jeff: You listen to Haleyy tell her story about what the woman was saying, and then Felix is really lagging behind because of his leg. He's about halfway down the ramp, and you're already down there. So you stop and you listen. You are recalling all the conversations you had during the auction, and this voice is extremely familiar to you. This particular person ruffled your feathers, not only because of who they are and the way they speak, but also because of who they work for. It's Rynn Kade of Nexus Trading. Well, well, well.
[00:19:12] Haleyy: That bitch!
[00:19:14] Robert: The hell's going on here? Yeah, and what makes her specifically untethered? How are we supposed to get paid?
[00:19:25] Star Master Jeff: The important questions, Thorny. Felix is just hobbling up as you say that, his legs squeaking. I already saw the sand.
[00:19:32] Thorne: Well, it seems like we've got a friend of ours ordering the unhallowed around in there. I don't know if you can hear her, but that's one of the people from the auction, Rynn Kade. Yeah, those names don't mean anything to me. She was with fucking Nexus. All the people to have to deal with.
[00:19:50] Felix: He's one of these little void freaks? Quite possibly, yeah.
[00:19:53] Haleyy: Apparently.
[00:19:54] Felix: Yes, sir. I don't know what these guys' deal is, but they freak me out.
[00:19:58] Star Master Jeff: At that moment, as you're looking through the antechamber door, you see the Unhallowed walking back and forth. And then a familiar-looking Unhallowed crosses in front of the door and trips, dropping a glass container that he was carrying, and it shatters all over the floor. Froggy's face is turned towards you, his eyes blank. You see tears streaming down his cheeks, and then you hear, You stupid son of a bitch! Get up and get another one! Those are valuable! And you see Rynn Kade come over and kick him in the side. He doesn't respond, except for to simply start standing up and shuffling back off to the right and out of sight. Or Reggie.
[00:20:39] Felix: Even as a little zombie, Froggy's a klutz. Come on, no one's allowed to treat Froggy like that except for us.
[00:20:44] Star Master Jeff: Meow?
[00:20:46] Felix: Did the damn cat follow us down here?
[00:20:50] Star Master Jeff: The cat rushes past you and disappears off to the right after seeing Froggy.
[00:20:55] Haleyy: No. Oh, Percy. Fuck. Okay.
[00:20:59] Thorne: Well, looks like Percy's taking lead now. We got to move before anyone else gets their ribs kicked.
[00:21:05] Haleyy: Yo, let's go. We got to go get them.
[00:21:07] Robert: Haleyy, do you want to start punching or you want me to kick this off?
[00:21:15] Haleyy: I think I'll start punching. It's been a while since I've been able to get out there.
[00:21:20] Thorne: Yeah, let's do it. Haleyy karate flips into the antechamber. Roundhouse kicks somebody. So it sounds like Haleyy and Robert are taking point.
[00:21:32] Robert: At this point, I would wait until I am completely in cover, close to the door as I can, peek over and try to shoot her specifically in the face. Rynn Kade? Yep, Rynn Kade.
[00:21:47] Star Master Jeff: okay so robert you sneak through the antechamber you peeking through the second door your elbow brushing up against the weird goo cake on the wall and inside of this goo pool room you can see that there are several unhallowed all moving around moving boxes and what was just out of sight but now you can see is off to the right Just before you start walking down the alleyway of glass containers where whatever it was back in the day was kept, you see that there are two Void Cultists, their backs to you, crouching, petting a cat. And directly behind the cat is Froggy, his way blocked by this thing that's going on in front of him, but he's mindless and has just stopped, and he's carrying a box and just is waiting for the way to be clear. And you can hear the Void Cultist saying, Well, that's a cute cat. What is this little cat doing here? This is adorable. And the other one's saying, I don't know. I don't know. It's kind of weird there's a cat here. Do you think it escaped from the offices? Maybe we should have searched them more thoroughly. I don't know, but I'm taking it back on the ship with me. Old Brother Calyx has got himself a cat. This is the best day ever. And regardless, I shoot Rynn Kade. Oh, Rynn Kade does not, sorry, I forgot to say, Rynn Kade is not visible at the moment. She must be down that alley of glass containers to the right. Because you can see the rest of everything else.
[00:23:09] Haleyy: All right, well then, Haleyy, making a stupid decision, is like, how did he get out of the ship and runs in and decks Brother Calyx?
[00:23:21] Thorne: Yeah, just jump kick him in the back of the head.
[00:23:22] Haleyy: Yeah, how dare he say he's going to take the cat back?
[00:23:25] Star Master Jeff: Robert, five seconds ago, Haleyy said she was going to wait for you to shoot. You're like, oh, Rynn Kade's not here. Maybe I can wait for her to come back, and then I'll shoot her to kick things off. But nope, Haleyy rockets past you like a fucking bad idea torpedo into the goo pool room.
[00:23:39] Haleyy: No, she doesn't rocket past. She goes, Haleyy, two whys, and just barrels him to death.
[00:23:48] Thorne: Oh my God, she just ran in.
[00:23:50] Star Master Jeff: And she just clunk, clunk, clunk, clunk, clunk, clunk, clunk. But she sprints into the room and the two void cultists turn around like they're crouching, petting a cat. And they're just like, this is the best day ever. Huh? And they both look up as Haleyy runs in. Okay, so everyone roll initiative. Okay, so both of these void cultists have lost their notice roll. Thorn's at the top of the initiative. Thorn, what would you like to do? I mean, you're outside the second doorway, still outside, standing on the hot sands of Sibylen. So you can't really even see what's going on, but you do know combat is afoot.
[00:24:22] Thorne: Oh my God, she just ran in. So Thorn is going to try to move up behind Robert, I think. Stick to the plan, stick to the plan. Thank you. But I do try to move up to where Robert is training his shot because there's where I'll be able to see, right? Yes. And when I get there, I'm just going to ready a shot for after whatever Haleyy is about to do. I will shoot anyone, any of the two cultists that's still standing.
[00:24:50] Star Master Jeff: Okay, so that makes it Robert Ross's turn. Thorn runs up directly next to you, and he kind of peeks through the door, and he can't see much because all he sees is Haleyy's mammoth back as she's sprinting towards these two void cultists. What would you like to do, Robert?
[00:25:07] Robert: I'm going to create a chain of possible chaos and it doesn't work. I'm going to say my if-then is if Thorn shoots, then I shoot. Okay.
[00:25:18] Star Master Jeff: It is now the Void Cultist's turn. He is surprised, so his turn consists of going, blah, blah, blah, blah, as he turns towards a extremely terrifying sight of Haleyy bearing down on him. Squeaky Legs McGee, you are back at the first door still.
[00:25:36] Felix: What would you like to do? So I'm going to follow Thorn and kind of crouch down behind him and Robert, taking cover, and I'm going to take a total defense action. because I don't want to get hurt.
[00:25:48] Star Master Jeff: Okay, Leroy, you just sprinted past Robert. What would you like to do?
[00:25:52] Haleyy: I would like to punch the guy holding Percy in the face. I want my cat back.
[00:25:59] Star Master Jeff: Your cat?
[00:26:00] Haleyy: It's no longer Frankie's cat.
[00:26:02] Star Master Jeff: He's like slowly like petting it really gentle.
[00:26:06] Haleyy: This is the scapegoat's cat.
[00:26:08] Star Master Jeff: Oh, my God. You got really attached to Percy. We didn't know the cat existed until five minutes ago. Punch his face off.
[00:26:13] Haleyy: Yeah, I punched his face off. All right.
[00:26:18] Star Master Jeff: Does a 13 hit? 13 does not hit. But he takes shock if his AC is what?
[00:26:25] Star Master Jeff: 15.
[00:26:26] Star Master Jeff: He does not take shock.
[00:26:28] Haleyy: What? Oh, boy. This is troubling. This is not good.
[00:26:33] Star Master Jeff: The worst part is you hit him, but his armor actually stopped it. What the hell are these guys made of? These are obviously some well-situated void cultists. Robert Ross, it's time for the big guns to step up. What would you like to do?
[00:26:48] Robert: Yeah, I am going to show them how the big boys do it. Please do. Holy shit, that is how the big boys do it. What the fuck? Oh my god. And that is a 27 to hit with 7 damage.
[00:27:06] Star Master Jeff: I was going to kind of lambast you for calling yourself a big boy, and then I was going to lambast Thorn for calling you a big boy as well, and then you rolled a 27 for 7 damage. Let me check their AC real quick. Yeah, is it higher than 27? Are they wearing a literal brick wall? You shoot a bullet that goes straight through his armor, straight into his chest, and knocks him back a foot. He falls forward onto his hands and gasps like he's been punched in the gut, and a big geyser of blood explodes out of his back and goes all over the floor, but he does not fall to the ground. Seven points of damage was not enough to take him completely out of the fight. Okay, here we go. First Void Cultist, the one that just got shot. He no longer surprised, but now with a hole in his body, but being a very blind faith Void Cultist, knowing he must succeed in the mission, unslings his own rifle. swings around already in a crouching position his training taking over you see that he obviously has some sort of military background and he aims straight at you robert but you are in partial cover he's gonna have a minus two to hit you 14 is going to miss you by one.
[00:28:27] Felix: Moving on to Felix. I'm going to run over to the goo cake. And now that I'm more familiar with the systems as I navigated the room downstairs, I want to see if I can figure out if this can control anything else other than just this door so I can use it to help the situation in some way. So I'm going to put my hand into it, begin feeling around and seeing if I can like connect into other parts of the system. I guess it's a nine then.
[00:28:51] Star Master Jeff: And you fail. No, I'm just kidding. Nine's a great roll. So you go in and you reach around a little bit. Not reach around. Hold on, let's do that again.
[00:28:58] Thorne: I think it's a different phrasing.
[00:28:59] Star Master Jeff: You go in and you manipulate the goo with your fingertips. And you reach through and realize that almost every surface in that room is manipulable with the Bundt cake. And that could be on your next turn. Anyway, Leeroy Jenkins, Haleyy, you ran forward and you kind of hurt your fist on this guy's armor. And then you see and saw another guy get blasted in the chest and then shake it off and start firing back at your friends. And you feel the first cold sweat wash over you that you felt since back on Wafisa when you took massive damage and had to be dragged back to an already commandeered scapegoat. What would you like to do?
[00:29:36] Haleyy: I'd like to keep going. Punch the same guy in front of me who is probably still hopefully... Actually, hopefully not holding on to the cat. Hopefully the cat got away. But either way.
[00:29:46] Star Master Jeff: Yeah, the cat on its turn runs behind Froggy, who's actually still just standing behind these two guys like lumps. So if somebody misses their shot, Froggy could die.
[00:29:54] Haleyy: Oh, God. All right, I'm going to punch him. That was a 24.
[00:29:59] Star Master Jeff: Whoa, 24. Okay, let me check his armor. Hold on, hold on. These guys are pretty tough.
[00:30:03] Haleyy: Uh-huh. For 11 damage. Holy fucking shit. Give me a cat.
[00:30:14] Star Master Jeff: With your hands? God damn. That's more damage than a bullet just did to another.
[00:30:18] Haleyy: With my hands.
[00:30:20] Star Master Jeff: He looks up at you as you rush him and you punch him in the chest. And he was surprised on his turn, so he didn't get to do anything. He just went, what the fuck? And you hurt your hand a little bit and you go, I'm going again. And then you just sock him in the jaw for nine points of damage. And a tooth flies out and he falls down to his hands. Percival's already run away and is scrambling up Froggy's back, digging his claws into Froggy's back. probably making him bleed but froggy is just completely blank face holding this little metal cube in his hands and the man looks back up at you and he says why who are you people so he is obviously still up and now it's actually his turn so he just turns to you and goes and he fumbles out his pistol takes aim at you and he fires does a nine hit you nope He shoots his laser pistol and scores across your armor and shoots at the ceiling a couple times and then falls backwards onto his back, exhausted.
[00:31:21] Haleyy: What are you people even doing here?
[00:31:23] Star Master Jeff: Praise the void! Okay. Meow. You hear Percival say on his turn.
[00:31:30] Haleyy: Percy!
[00:31:31] Star Master Jeff: Percival jumps off of Froggy onto Haleyy's shoulders.
[00:31:33] Haleyy: Oh, thank God.
[00:31:35] Star Master Jeff: That's what he does on his turn. Did you say, oh, thank God? Yeah.
[00:31:38] Haleyy: He's unhallowed right now. It's not safe for a cat.
[00:31:42] Thorne: He is. Thorne, your turn. All right, so I can hear Felix doing his thing behind me, and I see that both of these guys are still somehow alive, so I'm going to continue to unload this A cell onto the cultist that Robert and I have been shooting until he stops moving. He just plays dead.
[00:32:03] Star Master Jeff: He's like, please stop shooting me. Good enough. I'll take it.
[00:32:07] Thorne: But I miss, unfortunately. Thorne's not great with this. So he's just spraying laser bolts. I got a 10. So he's just spraying laser bolts into the hallway.
[00:32:15] Star Master Jeff: Robert Ross, why don't you show them how the big dog does it or whatever they call it. Yeah, how do the big boys do it?
[00:32:22] Robert: The big boys do it. The big boy? Who's the big boy?
[00:32:26] Thorne: Not me, clearly.
[00:32:29] Robert: And, oh, unfortunately, that is a measly 15. Ooh, a 15.
[00:32:37] Star Master Jeff: As we know, I am a warrior. Oh, is this for your scene? You're doing an auto-hit?
[00:32:42] Felix: I am a warrior.
[00:32:43] Star Master Jeff: Okay, so... Bang, bang. Roll damage with your auto hit. Oh, that would be 13 damage. Nice. You shoot the guy that you shot before in the shoulder slash upper chestal region, and you shave off his last few hit points by doing way more damage than you need to, completely blowing his heart out of his body, splattering gore, viscera, and tiny scraps of flesh all over Froggy. Just moments after Percival, Somehow, using the intuition that only a feline possesses, it leaps onto Haleyy's shoulder and comes out totally clean. Not one drop of blood upon his orange fur. The man collapses to the ground with a gasp.
[00:33:25] Thorne: See, this is why I leave the shooting to you.
[00:33:26] Star Master Jeff: Felix, your turn. Squeaky McGee. So, I...
[00:33:30] Felix: There's a hallway that goes down to, like, where all the glass tubes are, right?
[00:33:34] Star Master Jeff: Correct. It's basically where these two void cultists are, and then off to the right. Haleyy, you can see down that alleyway right now, but you have not been looking because you've been too busy punching. I want to try to close off that alleyway by manipulating, like, the walls and the floor. You reach out with your mind. Your previous hacking role for intelligence was to figure out how the system works. Now that you have deduced that you can control it, you have to do something that you are very uncomfortable with. And that's not use your brain, but use your heart. This is something that requires feelings and emotional intelligence to manipulate beyond the normal operations of the door. Something that you found last time when you dove into the goo pool or tried to interact with the Bundt cakes in a non-normal fashion. So go ahead and give me a program wisdom.
[00:34:24] Thorne: We should have gotten Vera to tell us what these things were called so we could stop saying goo and funky. Yeah, right? She must have a log somewhere where she called them like interfaces.
[00:34:33] Star Master Jeff: Yeah, I'm sure that there's like an industry term for them, but no one knows what they do. Industry term. That's an eight. I'll stick with the eight. An eight is great. An eight is powerful. Sideways is an infinity sign, and it is a success. You reach out with your mind, and you close off the hallway that leads off to the right. Haleyy, you are shocked when just 15 feet to your right, the opening that leads off to all of the big glass containers simply vanishes, and there's a seamless wall in its place. What the fuck? You say that, and then glance back at your friends in surprise, and you can see a really weird look on Felix's face as he rubs his hand on the wall that you can't see. You hear really, like, wet squelching sounds. So the void cultist that is still alive is now prone on his back, and he looks up at you, Haleyy. He looks over at his dead friend, and he says, "'Okay, I think that we can probably talk this out.'"
[00:35:34] Haleyy: Really? No, we can talk it out. Like, dude, what is going on here?
[00:35:40] Star Master Jeff: Uh, the guy looks around. Are you talking to me?
[00:35:44] Haleyy: Yes, I am obviously talking to you. You're like the only person here who I can talk to because everyone else seems to be unhallowed or something.
[00:35:54] Star Master Jeff: He slowly places down the laser pistol. Froggy jolts back to life and steps over the dead body. He tramples right over the body with his box and moves over to the southern side of the goo pool, drops off the box, and then walks over to the wall that Felix constructed and kind of stops, waiting for it to reopen so he can go get his next box. And while that's happening, the guy slowly places down his laser pistol, carefully. And he looks up at you while he's prone on his back on the ground and he says, I don't know how to answer that, but you're in an alien medical facility, okay?
[00:36:30] Haleyy: And?
[00:36:31] Star Master Jeff: My name is Marun.
[00:36:34] Haleyy: Yes, Marun, uh-huh.
[00:36:36] Star Master Jeff: I don't know what else to tell you, but please don't kill me. In fact, you seem quite capable, as do the rest of your friends. Perhaps you could find a place with us.
[00:36:46] Haleyy: I put my foot on his chest.
[00:36:49] Star Master Jeff: Okay, maybe not, maybe not.
[00:36:51] Haleyy: All right, yeah, we don't want anything to do with you.
[00:36:54] Star Master Jeff: Okay, wait, no, I got stuff that you might want. Hold on, wait. Yeah? Please, just take your foot off my chest.
[00:36:59] Haleyy: Then what's going on here? Why is Rynn Kade here ordering these people around?
[00:37:04] Star Master Jeff: Uh, oh, I don't know if I can tell you that.
[00:37:08] Haleyy: The foot goes back onto the chest.
[00:37:10] Star Master Jeff: Ugh! I'd rather die than betray the cult. But you could have that too. It gives you a lot of purpose in life. I already have the cult. Would you rather die than do anything else? Probably not, but if you join the cult, you have something.
[00:37:24] Haleyy: Well, you certainly would, and I shoved my foot through his chest.
[00:37:28] Star Master Jeff: Through his chest? Don't forget these guys have an over 15 AC.
[00:37:32] Haleyy: Did it work?
[00:37:33] Star Master Jeff: Okay. No, of course not. You just stomp on his chest and he goes, oh, what the fuck? ah dude ah you can crush his head though come on you can't crush his head okay yeah i'll crush his head ah dude what the and he's dead his brains splatter all over the place and a moment later you hear meow i know i pick up percy as fast as i can so he doesn't eat the brains first of all jumps off your shoulder brushes over to the brains and you grab percival immediately knowing exactly what a cat was gonna do and you're holding percival to your your chest
[00:38:06] Haleyy: is, um, did Froggy respond to any of this?
[00:38:10] Star Master Jeff: Froggy is standing, looking at a wall that used to be an opening into the storage area.
[00:38:17] Haleyy: Sorry, guys, he wasn't gonna help us out.
[00:38:19] Thorne: He didn't seem like he was the talkative type. No. I go over to Froggy, who is just blankly staring at this wall, and, like, place my hand on his shoulder in, like, a friendly way, knowing full well that he probably can't hear me or anything, and I just say, sorry about all this, buddy. We'll get you out of here.
[00:38:36] Felix: I could try giving him a little electrical shock therapy, Thorn, see if that snaps him out of it.
[00:38:41] Star Master Jeff: It occurs to you guys that there's like 13 or 14 other unhallowed. There's only Froggy in this room, and you'd have to sell three or four more of them on this level.
[00:38:50] Felix: Yeah, so if we can use Froggy as a guinea pig to figure out how to help everybody else.
[00:38:57] Thorne: I was going to scold you for just trying to think of excuses to hurt Froggy, but... A small electrical jolt does actually sound like it might have a benefit. I'm worried that you're doing it for sadistic reasons and not actually to be helpful.
[00:39:10] Felix: I want my little froggy back. It's just not the same without him. So I take out my data slab and I expose one of the electrical leads on the back. Okay. And I press it against the base of froggy's spine, like where it goes up into his skull, like that nerve junction right there.
[00:39:28] Star Master Jeff: Okay, so you press the electrical contact to the base of his skull, at the top of his spine. Yep. And you give him a, what do you have, a type A battery in there? Give him a little jolt? Yeah, give him a little jolt. He convulses as a shock ripples through his body. He sort of does a little bit of like a worm maneuver. Classic froggy. He's never done the worm once. This is the first time. And unfortunately, that doesn't seem to do anything at all.
[00:39:58] Felix: I mean, we got a cool dance out of it, I guess. Well, it was worth a shot. Hopefully there's some kind of control mechanism that these assholes have that we can use to snap these guys out of it. I really hope so, Felix. In the meantime, I mean, we're kind of stuck. I closed this wall so that nobody else came in, but, I mean, that's, I think, our only way forward. Can you get back in the Bundt cake? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I can, I guess. We got to be ready for whatever's on the other side. I do want to take a look at the boxes that Froggy was bringing in here. I want to, like, see what's inside of these.
[00:40:30] Haleyy: Oh, good call.
[00:40:31] Felix: And also, like, where did Rynn Kade go? I assume down that hallway. And I gesture at the wall that I've closed.
[00:40:39] Star Master Jeff: So you go over, Felix, and you start taking a look at the boxes. It's a lot of, like, alien tech and just various alien debris from the exocyte.
[00:40:49] Felix: This is just a bunch of alien detritus. There's no value in any of this that I can see. I look longingly at the pool, knowing that I can't access it without Dr. Voss here, unfortunately.
[00:41:02] Thorne: I think our only option is to reopen this hallway. Do we want to use our good friend Reginald here as bait or to follow him and see where he goes? Maybe one of us could pose as unhallowed. I mean, I know Robert loves posing as things. Wait a second.
[00:41:19] Felix: Hayley, didn't you think you could control these guys?
[00:41:22] Haleyy: I was curious about it, yeah.
[00:41:23] Thorne: Oh, give Froggy a command.
[00:41:25] Haleyy: Froggy, drop the box.
[00:41:28] Star Master Jeff: Froggy is not carrying a box. I hand him a box. So command complete.
[00:41:36] Haleyy: No, Froggy, pick up the box.
[00:41:41] Star Master Jeff: Froggy picks up a box.
[00:41:43] Haleyy: Oh, this is so exciting. Oh my God, it worked.
[00:41:45] Star Master Jeff: Damn, Haleyy.
[00:41:46] Haleyy: Wait, we can ask him questions. Froggy, what are you guys doing here?
[00:41:52] Felix: There's no answer. Can you snap him out of it? Can you like make him him again? Yeah, order him to stop listening to you.
[00:42:00] Haleyy: Froggy, stop being unhallowed.
[00:42:03] Star Master Jeff: Froggy does not react. Worth dry.
[00:42:06] Haleyy: Froggy, stop being unhallowed right now.
[00:42:10] Star Master Jeff: Yeah, he does not respond to your orders for him to stop being himself because now he's unhallowed. That's just who he is, man.
[00:42:17] Haleyy: I don't want that to be just who he is. Froggy just ghosted in the corner over there.
[00:42:23] Star Master Jeff: Froggy goes and sits in the corner over there.
[00:42:26] Haleyy: Thank you. Well, that's interesting.
[00:42:29] Thorne: At least that's healthier for him than Felix jolting him or the next thing I was going to suggest, which was for you to knock him out. But if you can just tell him to stay safe, that's maybe even better.
[00:42:37] Haleyy: Yeah, I think that'll work.
[00:42:40] Felix: Honestly, Haleyy, and Felix has kind of taken a step back from her because this is very odd stuff. I haven't seen anybody control anybody else like that, except maybe this one time with some pre-tech that I witnessed, like a slave network put together. It's freaking me out that you're just doing this.
[00:42:58] Haleyy: It's freaking me out, too. It has to have something to do with that, you know, what they said back on Scrapjack and... All this weird alien shit.
[00:43:08] Star Master Jeff: Percy squirms out of your grasp, Haleyy, and goes over to Froggy and nuzzles up in his cross-legged, like, nook, and they hang out together and goes to sleep.
[00:43:18] Haleyy: Froggy, your mission is to take care of Percy.
[00:43:21] Star Master Jeff: Froggy does not respond.
[00:43:23] Haleyy: Froggy, give me a thumbs up if you understand.
[00:43:26] Star Master Jeff: Froggy gives you one thumbs up and then leaves it up. Can you tell him to put it down?
[00:43:31] Haleyy: Froggy, put your arm down.
[00:43:33] Star Master Jeff: Froggy puts his arm down, but his thumb is still up.
[00:43:36] Felix: Haleyy, Haleyy, Haleyy, tell him to flip off Robert. No. Would you two stop it? Felix, get over to that control panel and open this door. I don't know how I became the door guy, but this is ridiculous.
[00:43:48] Star Master Jeff: Felix, you make your way over to the goo cake and tell me what you were trying to achieve.
[00:43:52] Felix: So I'm trying to basically not remove the whole wall, but open up like small holes that people can look through and potentially shoot through. And so they're basically not exposing any part of their body to like return fire.
[00:44:08] Star Master Jeff: Oh, very smart. So you open up three square holes in the wall and your compatriots immediately rush over to look through into the room beyond. And what they see is unfortunately something we're going to have to deal with next week because we're out of time for tonight. Well, that's it for this week. Thanks for listening to the Dark Star Adventure Cast. Big thanks to our cast, Brian as Thorn, Scott as Felix, Doja as Robert, and Steph as Haleyy with two Ys. And, as always, I'm Star Master Jeff, playing everyone and everything else. And big thanks to Brad and Holly, our Scapegoat Syndicate members, over on Patreon.com. Robert's warrior ability did a lot of work tonight. If you want to know exactly how the warrior class functions in Stars Without Number, Brian is breaking it down in his next Stars Without Number Rules Explained, coming out just in two days, the Thursday right after this episode drops, right here in the same feed. Check it out, you won't be disappointed. Next time on the Dark Star Adventurecast, the crew of the scapegoat has a clear view through Felix's holes, and what they see on the other side has definitely changed the plan. Rynn Kade is waiting, and she has a lot to answer for. The battle that follows will put one crew member at death's door, and when Haleyy steps up to do something about it, everything the crew thought they knew about her changes. Tune in to find out more, and until then, keep following that signal.