Episode 3: Wafisa? I hardly know her!

In this episode of Dark Star Adventurecast, the crew reels from their near-death clash with the Drift Rats and sets course for the ominous OmniTech Holdings research base on the planet Wafisa. Their mission: pick up the enigmatic Dr. Elara Voss before venturing into the void, chasing the coordinates of a mysterious signal.

Tune in for a tense, post-apocalyptic journey through the Veridian Expanse.

Meet the Crew:

  • Jeff as Star Master (Game Master)

  • Brian as Captain Thorn

  • Stephanie as the warrior Haley

  • Doja as the wildcard pilot Robert

  • Scott as the transhuman hacker Felix

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  • Episode 3

    Star Master Jeff: [00:00:00] Previously on Dark Star Adventures, our crew of misfits and mercenaries was sent on a secret mission by Omnitech Corporation. Their journey started on the rough and tumble station, Cami four, where they wrestled with a local gang, the drift rats, and befriended another, the Neon Fang. They were able to secure an aging Starship, but no sooner had they launched than they came under fire from a pair of strike fighters piloted by those same drift rats.

    Star Master Jeff: Now the crew has just fought them off. They have named their ship and they have moved off into the void to meet the mysterious Dr. Alar Vos. What will happen next for the crew of the scapegoat?

    Haleyy: Yeah,

    Thorne: I know a bad deal when I see one.

    Haleyy: You were just telling us about how we're going to get our throat slit.

    Robert: The head kept on doing something funny. Let's just put him in the trunk real quick.

    Felix: I never said I was stealing. I said I would divvy it up later maybe.

    Star Master Jeff: So sit back and enjoy tonight's thrilling session of Dark Star [00:01:00] Adventures.

    Star Master Jeff: Yay.

    Star Master Jeff: Welcome back crew. Uh, everything's named the scapegoat. How do you feel about the name?

    Thorne: I was surprised everybody jumped on it that they liked it so much. That was like my fifth choice. Felix could not care less. Felix doesn't care about anything except getting high ed robots. How's it gonna get high if he's a robot?

    Thorne: Just something to think about. Oh, there's ways.

    Haleyy: Might be a self selling prophecy

    Robert: and Yeah, I'm gonna say scapegoat a little bit too fitting. Where'd you come up with that Thorn?

    Thorne: Well, it's a bit of a personally appropriate title since, well, you know, these corpo can't be trusted. Right? Last time I got tangled up with one of these, ended up in prison for almost 10 years.

    Robert: I am 10 years a hard time. I mean, I just wound up in medical bankruptcy. But lemme tell you [00:02:00] can't trust these car pos no further than you can throw 'em two

    Star Master Jeff: true. Two true. So you've named your ship and you move off into the void for several months. It's quite a long trip. You're moving all the way off to the var treat sector, which is several sectors away.

    Star Master Jeff: You've got six weeks of travel actually, so. Not quite several months, almost two months of travel ahead of you. You've all heard of all the major planets and, and cities in this area and in this whole, in this whole sector. Well, FISA was a mostly wild world with a single mega city on it, but something went wrong at some point, and most of the people abandoned the city.

    Star Master Jeff: That's all you know. But Dr. Elara Vos. Is there and there is a lab and a base there owned by Omnitech and you are going to pick her up. So the scapegoat enters atmosphere six weeks after leaving Kamir four and lands at one [00:03:00] of the two space ports on Afia, both of them in the same mega city. Also named Waa, not very creative people in this area of the galaxy.

    Everyone: And the

    Star Master Jeff: Spaceport is also called Waa, and everyone here is named Waa. The scapegoats doors hiss open to reveal a world consumed by silence. The air of the Spaceport is unnervingly still with no signs of activity, just empty docking bays and flickering half functional lighting. Even the echoes of your footsteps seem hesitant.

    Star Master Jeff: As if afraid to break the unnatural quiet in the center of the terminal. A help desk flickers to life, most likely long dormant an Android, it's torso bolted directly to the floor, greets you with a static lad voice, it's missing. Its lower half, leaving only a crude reminder of its former mobility.

    Star Master Jeff: Welcome to Port Ascension. [00:04:00] How may I assist you

    Robert: beyond? It

    Star Master Jeff: is the

    Robert: door

    Star Master Jeff: to the street.

    Robert: Port Ascension is not Port wa Fesa.

    Star Master Jeff: Yes. Ascension. Where you can lift your ship into space.

    Robert: Oh hell. Well we made some of that. 'cause uh, lemme tell you, I had a little bit of a rough landing on this one and uh, we may be pretty low on fuel guys.

    Robert: Well on

    Thorne: fuel. How can that be? There's no way we're gonna be able to get cheap fuel around here. We've been traveling for months, thorn wasn't there? Extra fuel in the car? Go. Oh. Oh yeah.

    Felix: Yeah. I, I think we might have enough for maybe one more jump, but that's probably about it. So, uh, after we finish our business here, we might wanna think about fueling up

    Star Master Jeff: fuel.

    Star Master Jeff: If you're looking for fuel, you should consider visiting our beautiful city of Waa.

    Felix: That's why, that's why we're here. Boss

    Star Master Jeff: Waa the land of many

    Felix: opportunities. This portal, man, look,

    Star Master Jeff: he's

    Felix: a, a wonderful planet to visit. He's seen, he's seen some hard times as old man.

    Robert: Felix, can you like [00:05:00] jack up and like find out within there fuel is,

    Felix: uh, I mean Robert, I don't think find a fuel is our priority right now.

    Felix: We got a job to do first.

    Robert: I mean, I don't know how we're getting outta here without it.

    Haleyy: I think Robert has a point. We have people coming after us. We kind of need to be able to get away pretty quickly, but we also need food supplies.

    Felix: Yeah, I know. We gotta, we gotta resupply. Alright, let, let me see what we got here.

    Star Master Jeff: Yes, you walk behind. It's just the, the Android is directly wired in. There's no actual terminal here, but the Android itself does have a Port

    Felix: E. Excuse me. I good sir. I'm just gonna connect in here just to find some information. I hope. I hope you don't mind. I'll all but gentle. I promise.

    Star Master Jeff: Well visa from its gentle sloping hills to its stunning vistas is, yeah.

    Star Master Jeff: Yeah. We saw, we saw all that. Yep. Here we go. Alright, so roll your hacking or programming or whatever you're using. It's a land of many dreams. NN. So you hack in and on your datalab, you can [00:06:00] see in the three panels of your screen the different functions that are running on this Android.

    Felix: Well, I'll start with getting like a full map of the area, just like the general kind of layout so we know where, how to navigate around.

    Felix: I'm very

    Star Master Jeff: clever. So you are able to easily download a full map of the city of Waa on planet Waa. Perfect.

    Felix: All right guys. I got that map that we're looking for. You guys want anything? Otherwise I'm just gonna let this old man rest.

    Thorne: As long as it's got information on the different points of interest, then it should be fine.

    Felix: Yeah, I got, well, pizza is a gas mining colony. I guess I could try to look up that dock or whoever. It's that we're after here.

    Robert: I was gonna say, does, uh, because she's at the Omnitech lab, does uh, that map have that, uh, that their lab on her,

    Star Master Jeff: uh, lemme take a look. It does not specifically say that there's an omnitech lab.

    Star Master Jeff: No.

    Haleyy: Is there anything about. Haley's racking her brain right now. She, she is really feeling her like low in at the moment. She's like, anything there about a, a Mistretta four?

    Star Master Jeff: There is something about a Mistretta four. Yeah. Haley. Yeah. Find [00:07:00] something

    Felix: here.

    Star Master Jeff: There is building that's labeled Misrata four. It's next to Misrata three, two, and one.

    Felix: Yeah. Looks like, looks like it's, it's right here. Should be able to get over there pretty easily, I think.

    Star Master Jeff: Right. Sweet. What were you thinking? Did you remember that Misrata for is the Omnitech face?

    Haleyy: So I've decided that Hailey takes copious amounts of notes because of her low in, because that's what I tend to do while we play.

    Haleyy: But yes, so I remem, I went back through my little notepad, I guess, of Hailey's and

    Felix: I love that, like Hailey, it's like flipping out a pad and like making notes,

    Haleyy: which honestly can create a whole lot of interesting problems later on as well if she's like really taking a shit ton of notes of things we don't necessarily want getting out.

    Haleyy: Um, but yes, I remembered that was part of the mission that we originally received is.

    Star Master Jeff: Hailey taking notes on a standard notepad or on a digital tablet.

    Haleyy: It is definitely a standard notepad and she's very analog about this

    Star Master Jeff: really. So you got a pen and paper.

    Haleyy: She has like a little pen and a little teeny golf pencil.

    Haleyy: 'cause this is all stuff that she can like shove into her armor.

    Felix: It's actually a [00:08:00] regular pencil. It just looks like a golf pencil in Hailey in Hailey's pants.

    Star Master Jeff: So Hailey pulls out her notebook and starts flipping back a couple pages. You know Drift rats? Neon lames. Oh yeah. Estrada four. You're able to look it up.

    Star Master Jeff: You remember that it's the Omnitech Holdings base here on WAA and you're able to pinpoint it on the map. Waa land on many opportunities,

    Felix: right? Well, no destination. Bit of a walk, but nothing we can't handle. Maybe as I rub my ache and joints.

    Star Master Jeff: And what about supplies? So here in the Spaceport, there is no people at all.

    Star Master Jeff: Everything is completely abandoned. So you walk around a little bit and there's a lot of shops that are shuttered. Some of them are open, but. Their story's all the same. There's nothing in there. The shops have been cleared out, either pillaged or just simply closed because there's no clientele. There's no other ships that have docked anywhere.

    Star Master Jeff: When you're looking out the windows of the Spaceport, this place seems completely abandoned.

    Haleyy: This is not good. [00:09:00]

    Thorne: Not a single soul to make a deal with.

    Felix: Well, it answers at our destination. But this is, uh, this is a bit eerie, folks. I'm gonna kinda like walk in Hailey's shadow essentially.

    Haleyy: I'm trying to look through my notes because like I have the notice skill, but I'm not sure if there's anything that I can discern that looks immediately dangerous as I like look around all these storefronts.

    Star Master Jeff: Right, right. Go ahead and roll notice if you're actively searching for. You know, some sort of threat. Go ahead and roll notice.

    Haleyy: I don't notice shit. Oh my God. You

    Star Master Jeff: don't, you don't even notice.

    Felix: Was Felix

    Star Master Jeff: walking? I don't even

    Haleyy: notice. They're empty. Yeah. I, I just feel like the mountain mocking around.

    Star Master Jeff: So with a four, you take a good, hard look.

    Star Master Jeff: As hard as you can. You really look hard, and then you get fatigued after a couple seconds and say, fuck it. And you don't look anymore.

    Haleyy: Oh, Chuck's out. Looks good [00:10:00] to me.

    Felix: Is it a pretty straight shot to where we're going or am I having to, are we having to navigate quite a bit? Through, through the streets, you'll be

    Star Master Jeff: navigating quite a bit.

    Star Master Jeff: Alright, so you step out into the streets and you find the city equally devoid of life as the spaceport itself. There's crumbling skyscrapers that are looming above you, hunched over like giants, and there's empty vehicles sitting abandoned, dotting the middle of the street up on the sidewalk. Their drivers seem to have vanished, commute, abandoning their vehicles at whatever point they decided was most, most appropriate for whatever trouble they ran into.

    Star Master Jeff: It's over a mile to the research base and it looks as though it's gonna be a trek through a complete ghost town.

    Thorne: It seems like the stories that this place was abandoned were no exaggeration. Be like, do you think I can get a copy of that map? You know, just in case.

    Star Master Jeff: Yeah,

    Felix: sure. I'll send it over our network to everybody.

    Star Master Jeff: So the map [00:11:00] gets sent out to everyone except for Hailey whose data pad is famously broken because she inherited her sister's shitty clamshell data pad from 20 years ago that probably got beat up and half broken in battle. Hailey, I'm assuming that you whip out your analog notepad in pen, right?

    Haleyy: Yep. Whip out my notepad and just can someone please just, yeah, can you show me the map?

    Haleyy: Can you show me the map? Thanks. I appreciate it.

    Felix: What are you doing? Oh, I can't believe it's a three dimensional.

    Thorne: Nevermind. Haley, I could get you a really good deal on a new

    Felix: data pad.

    Haleyy: Nope.

    Robert: Nope. Have y'all seen this? She's got the perspective in this and everything. She doesn't need your fancy data pads.

    Haleyy: Thank you, Robert.

    Star Master Jeff: When she shows you the data pad that she's talking about and then goes back to sketching the map, it's an old fashioned military data pad from 20 years ago, and the fact that it's military puts 20 more years out of date. It meant to close up and protect the screen in like a clamshell design, and when she like briefly opens it up to show you the screen is cracked, the antenna that is supposed to telescope off the [00:12:00] top has permanently broken off.

    Star Master Jeff: The fact that it can receive any sort of message whatsoever is miraculous in. Felix, you looking at that for the moment that she flashes it and then puts it back in her bag, you're not so sure that it will even turn on.

    Felix: It gets phone calls. Alright, that is important. Gotta just make sure to stay in contact.

    Star Master Jeff: Hailey is sketching this map with Robert holding his data pad up for her, Felix and Thorn. Is there anything you want to do with what is likely the next five minutes?

    Thorne: Yeah, you said that everything looks completely abandoned around here, right? Like it's all sort of left in place, frozen in time, kind of abandoned.

    Thorne: Yes.

    Star Master Jeff: Everything has a good layer of dust on it. It's obviously been several years.

    Thorne: My first inclination is to find, like, obviously you mentioned that things look picked clean already, but my first inclination is to try and scout anything of value that we can take out of here. If this place has been abandoned a long time, then there's a chance that some of this stuff is no longer easily available.

    Thorne: There's the retro angle, like people will pay extra for nostalgia.

    Star Master Jeff: Okay? So you [00:13:00] go rooting around for those five, 10 minutes that you have. You do find some vintage cars. Not only have they been sitting here for a while, but you're kind of on an outer planet. So a lot of the technology that they received was older to begin with, and then there was never a replacement for this technology, so it just kind of got passed down from one person to the next.

    Star Master Jeff: Inside one of the cars you find a pack of trading cards. For an old children's TV show called Loki

    Thorne: Pawn. Oh man, these are classic Felix. Get a load of these. Do you remember Loki Pawns? Uh, no. You didn't collect Loki Pawns. Oh my God, I'm taking this.

    Robert: I was always a tragic, the gathering kind of man himself.

    Thorne: Oh, Robert. Yeah. You know what I'm talking about though.

    Star Master Jeff: So it's an unopened pack as well as a full already assembled. Dak

    Thorne: these, these will fetch a decent price from the right buyer. I'll tell you that. I could have sworn this was all [00:14:00] gonna be junk. You also find five credits.

    Robert: Who cares about five credits?

    Robert: I wanna know if we got a foil Charizard in those Loki ponds.

    Thorne: Oh, we're not opening this one, Robert. No. No way. You know how much these will go for. Still sealed.

    Star Master Jeff: And just to be clear, Loki pawns, you don't catch them all. You're trying to avoid catching any of them. Gotta

    Thorne: avoid all costs.

    Star Master Jeff: Loki Pond. Gotta catch

    Robert: none.

    Robert: The cards are like, dive into a bush very quickly. Here comes the Loki pond. Oh shit. It wants an owner avoid responsibility. It cost five manna, but let me tell you, totally worth it.

    Haleyy: How old do we think this is?

    Star Master Jeff: Wal Thorne. You collected them when you were a child, which is how long ago? Uh, that would've been been years ago,

    Haleyy: is we've already been in, you know, traveling here for a couple of months to find, to find the dock.

    Haleyy: And I'm a little worried.

    Robert: And these are base set.

    Haleyy: Is there anything newer than this?

    Robert: Yeah, I mean that, those gotta be rare. Was there a whole lot of dust on these?

    Thorne: Yeah, they've been, they've been sitting here obviously a very long time, [00:15:00] but a little clean 'em up a little bit. Nobody will notice the carts themselves in the deck look like they're still in good shape.

    Thorne: 'cause they were in this deck case and this is a seal.

    Star Master Jeff: Felix the only person who's not talking about Loki on cards. Wait, Loki coupon cards. Wait, what were they called? Loki Pond. Felix the only person that wasn't talking about loon cards. Your head was on a swivel because you're all about business. That's right.

    Star Master Jeff: You see two men emerge from the shadow of a building about a hundred feet south of you. They're wearing battered armor, barely held together. They have golden shields spray painted. Uh, with a odd insignia of, looks like a very abstract, like pointy logo. They have thick chest plates and helmets with large wings bolted onto either side.

    Star Master Jeff: They begin to clank towards you as your friends continue to argue behind you about low, low key coupon cards. Hey,

    Felix: we got a situation here. We got company, I back up kind of behind Hailey and [00:16:00] Robert.

    Star Master Jeff: I stash the cards they walk up to. They're about 10 feet from you. Gentlemen, I, I thought this place was abandoned.

    Star Master Jeff: How can we help you welcome travelers to wafi? We are guardians of the great work.

    Felix: You, you don't say the work, huh?

    Star Master Jeff: Well that's great indeed. Unfortunately, because you're new here and you didn't stop in at our town office to pay the tax, we'll have to collect the tax now.

    Thorne: Oh, well, wouldn't you know it? We were actually on our way to do that right now, weren't we, Felix?

    Thorne: That's

    Star Master Jeff: right. Right, Hailey. Totally. That's great. That's great. The great work is all that matters. And for the good of the work, we will be collecting that tax.

    Robert: Now can y'all tell me a little bit more about the great work and what our tax dollars will be, uh, paying for? 'cause we actually did pay the, uh, the, the toll in the other WA fisa.

    Robert: We weren't sure if those two were connected. What do you mean the other wa fisa? Not Waa. [00:17:00] It was, it was man by a guy named Waa.

    Star Master Jeff: Okay? You're starting to confuse him and I'm gonna need you to roll for that.

    Haleyy: It's their fault for naming everything the same thing.

    Star Master Jeff: So go ahead and roll, talk charisma, and let's see how far you can get with this.

    Robert: Well, um, I don't talk real good, so, uh, I rolled a three. Oh

    Star Master Jeff: boy. Okay. So your attempt to confuse him about another place called WA FISA fails and he says. No matter. No matter it, uh, it doesn't matter. Listen, that's gonna be 50 standard credits each and for the, for the good of the work. Yes. And then you can stay in the city as long as you want and you'll be under the Guardian's protection.

    Star Master Jeff: There's a lot of scary people in this town, and you don't want them to slit your throats. We've seen literally no people. Well, you've seen two now, and let me assure you, there's a lot more

    Robert: and my good serves. How will others know that we've [00:18:00] properly paid our fee?

    Star Master Jeff: Trust us, we'll protect you. That'll be 50 credits each.

    Felix: Fellas. This seems to be like a shakedown.

    Star Master Jeff: I know a bad deal when I see one. Well, here's the thing. We're trying to be nice to you. You didn't go to the office and properly check in. It's 50 credits. If you go to the office, if we catch people walking around Bfia, they haven't paid the price yet. It's 75. Do you want me to charge you 75 or would you rather pay 50?

    Haleyy: Um, there was a robot who told us all about the opportunities here in Wafi, and she didn't mention anything about this.

    Star Master Jeff: Sorry for the inconvenience. That will be 50 credits. And if you say one more word, it's gonna be 75. Do you want it to be 75? He tightens his grip on his, uh, battle rifle. Gentleman.

    Thorne: Gentleman, I don't think we need to get so worked up over. That's it. It'll be 75. Okay, listen,

    Haleyy: rap of course. They calls again.

    Robert: This is [00:19:00] drift

    Haleyy: Rap

    Robert: behavior is indeed drift Rap behavior.

    Thorne: I keep talking like that and I'm gonna have to ask my good friend Hailey here for the 75 credit she's keeping in her fists

    Haleyy: a, a flex.

    Haleyy: I, I make myself look even larger.

    Thorne: Hailey, are you carrying a gun? I,

    Haleyy: I actually, I do carry a gun. Do I have it right? Carry

    Star Master Jeff: two guns.

    Haleyy: Act three.

    Star Master Jeff: Okay. So they see how well armed you are. Yeah,

    Haleyy: and I also have a really large advanced weapon. It's basically like a clay war on my back.

    Star Master Jeff: Oh, okay. Yeah. Oh my. So these two guys see how well armed you are?

    Haleyy: Yeah.

    Star Master Jeff: Like the whole group of you and the leader says. Okay. Okay. I'm sorry. I think, uh, I think we came on a bit strong. You think

    Haleyy: a bit.

    Star Master Jeff: If you don't want to pay the tax, that's fine. Just please stay outta trouble while you're here. How's that sound? With each call, our own separate way, we don't need to have any sort of altercation.

    Haleyy: But you were just telling us about how we're going get our throat [00:20:00] slit.

    Star Master Jeff: Yeah, that was a warning, not a threat. They're fool of me. Yeah. I think their bark is worse. Their bite. Hailey,

    Haleyy: are you sure?

    Star Master Jeff: Listen, we're gonna go,

    Haleyy: what are your names?

    Star Master Jeff: What are our badge numbers? What's your operating number? Waa and Waa.

    Haleyy: Waa what?

    Star Master Jeff: Waa, please. Yeah. Well I am, uh, Jorgen and the other guy goes, yeah, and I'm slap so we're gonna go now. Sorry to bother you. We didn't realize you were, make your way to the office. How about that? If you can go to the office and pay. The toll, that'll be fine. And you know, you probably don't even need our protection.

    Star Master Jeff: It looks like you can take care of yourself. So, and they're kind of backing away, so don't worry about it. Everything's cool.

    Thorne: I look at them incredulously, but I accept it because this is exactly what I want them to do, which is go away and not take my money.

    Felix: He looks kind of smirks and waves at them.

    Haleyy: See you round jorgen.

    Star Master Jeff: It's uh, for the good of the work. For the good of the work.

    Felix: Oh, oh yeah, [00:21:00] yeah. The work. Uhhuh. Oh.

    Star Master Jeff: And they, they're backing up and then they finally turn their backs on you and they round the corner back outta sight.

    Robert: Well, that was weird. Yeah. Y'all, did they ever tell us what the work is? I mean, that feels a little genocide.

    Felix: There's just the two of, of them, those scenes just stuff. Property just outta nowhere.

    Robert: Yeah. Where did they even

    Thorne: come from,

    Felix: Felix? I mean, I, I took out the map to see if there for the direction that we were going or not.

    Star Master Jeff: Yes. And Hailey, can you roll notice for me? She can notice things. She's too busy flexing right now.

    Star Master Jeff: I mean, my God, look at them guns. Nice. Good roll. Okay, so Hailey, you were watching them leave as everyone started talking and they rounded a corner about 25 feet away, about 20 seconds later as. The rest of your compatriots are talking. You see one of them pop out gun at the ready, take aim

    Haleyy: Jorgen. I knew he was a guy

    Star Master Jeff: and with that we're gonna enter combat.

    Star Master Jeff: Yeah, that's kind of what I expect. Yeah. Okay. So I need [00:22:00] everyone to before combat roll notice and we're doing notice wisdom. Okay? So everyone that got a seven or above. And I'm sorry Hailey, you didn't have to re-roll. Oh, okay. So anyone that goes seven or above is aware of the combatants. They heard Hailey's warning and they clocked them aiming around the corner.

    Star Master Jeff: That was nervous. Yeah.

    Thorne: So nobody,

    Haleyy: am I the only person who got above a seven? Oh God.

    Robert: None of you. We were all just amazed. Girl, do those biceps have some baby oil on 'em? I mean,

    Thorne: sweet J. Haley just grabs Thorn and Felix by the head and just slams them down behind Cupboard. She's like, get behind me

    Star Master Jeff: everyone.

    Star Master Jeff: Roll initiative. So he. Two guardians of the work are 25 feet away only Hailey is really aware of them though. Everyone will be aware of them by the end of the first round. So just as Hailey warns you, the first guy takes a shot [00:23:00] aiming straight at Hailey. The laser fire rips through the air and hits the 17.

    Star Master Jeff: Is that hit you? Yep. The laser rips through your armor dealing six points of damage.

    Haleyy: Hailey goes, Nope, nope, nope. And I am, I'm gonna use my ability to negate that damage. So,

    Star Master Jeff: Felix, you're hiding behind Hailey. She all of a sudden shifts out of the way in a laser bolt, almost takes off your head and rips off into the distance.

    Haleyy: Holy shit. Sorry.

    Star Master Jeff: The next guardian of the great work takes aim once again at Haley. The one person that seems to have noticed them, but also the largest, most hulking figure that is the closest to them. A nine is a miss. The laser goes wide, scoring a mark in a nearby stone building, and everyone else slowly becomes aware that this battle is happening.

    Star Master Jeff: As Haley, you leap into action. What would you like to do?

    Haleyy: Like Hailey's? Pretty pissed at this point. She's gonna, [00:24:00] um. You know, just kind of draw herself back up to her full strength and charge ahead because she is not going to let Jurgen and slap get away with this, and she punches Jurgen in the face.

    Star Master Jeff: Very nice. A giant haymaker rockets out of Haley's fist. It's he charges 25 feet and attempts to land it squarely on his jaw. So go ahead and roll to hit on that one. Oh, critical. Miss you run forward, you trip over your own feet, but as you go down to a knee, because you're a big, dumb, clumsy body, your elbow slaps organ right in the throat.

    Haleyy: How's that for work?

    Star Master Jeff: Sorry, you say it to him. Yeah, sorry, sorry, sorry. I didn't need to make fun of your work. Right now we're in combat Round two. Everyone is now aware that there was combat happening. Hailey has sprinted away. Two laser bolts have ripped off into the distance. Jurgen is kind of tied up with you right next to him.

    Star Master Jeff: So he drops his laser rifle, which he has slung around his chest on a [00:25:00] strap and he. Swiftly draws out a well-oiled electro knife. He attempts to hit you with that. Uh, he rolled a 19, so not quite a critical hit, but with a plus one, he's added 20. So that hits you for five points of damage, the electricity courses through your body, and he knocks you down to zero hit points.

    Star Master Jeff: You've fallen down to a knee at this point, and you just kinda like fall down into your hands and knees. Your friends are 25 feet behind you. Things are looking grim for Hailey. Felix, what can you do, buddy?

    Felix: Well, is there cover around like what part of the street we're in? Something I could tuck behind?

    Star Master Jeff: Yes. There are a couple abandoned vehicles like sprinkled around the street as well as some lampposts and some just general refuse.

    Felix: Alright, so the first thing I do, I. Draw my laser pistol and line up a shot of the guy looming over Haley and pull off a shot before I into cover

    Star Master Jeff: a 10. A 10 is gonna hit them exactly

    Felix: five points [00:26:00] of damage.

    Felix: Then as a laser bolt rich into Jorgen

    Star Master Jeff: Jorgen, who has previously already taken shock damage from Haley's clumsy jugular elbow. Falls to the ground. The advanced knife slipping from his grasp. He holds the hole in his chest and he says, I wish I had told Laura lie how much I loved her when I had the chance.

    Star Master Jeff: And then he dies.

    Thorne: You lay now,

    Star Master Jeff: sorry to humanize your enemies, but this guy lived and he loved, and I'm not embarrassed to say it. They're all humans. They're own humans. And I,

    Felix: I que over

    Star Master Jeff: and kind

    Felix: of duck behind a car.

    Star Master Jeff: Okay. The other guardian of the great work goes, do get no, and he takes a step back and he wants to aim at who he thinks shot.

    Star Master Jeff: But Felix has ducked behind cover, so he takes a pot shot at th

    Felix: Wow. Rude. Sorry, thorn. It might be because Why I duck behind the Guard. I said he did it and I pointed at you,

    Star Master Jeff: the guardian of the great work trusts Felix so much that Thorn is [00:27:00] the one that killed his friend York. And he goes, thanks brother.

    Star Master Jeff: And then he shoots boom and hits thorn on an 18 for six points of laser rifle. A damage

    Thorne: Thorn is still kind of fiddling with his Loki pond cards when this all started. And as soon as he heard the blaster fire and the chaos. Ensued. He quickly like his neck jerks and snaps over towards where it's coming from.

    Thorne: Just in time to see a laser bolt fly into his chest and take him out, he falls to the ground

    Star Master Jeff: thorn. You spin in a very fancy pirouette, taking a laser bolt to your shoulder and falls to the ground. At zero hip points, which is actually Hailey, you're also at zero hip points, right? Mm-hmm. Exactly.

    Everyone: Yep.

    Star Master Jeff: Okay.

    Star Master Jeff: Robert Ross. Here we go. Robert, now's your time to shine. Save the group. What can you do? Afro Samurai.

    Robert: I step out guns a blazing, right out into the, the middle. No cover needed. Square 'em up, [00:28:00] purposely strafing right as far as I can to make sure that I don't get Haley in any, uh. Incidental fire and I'll let rip with my combat raffle.

    Star Master Jeff: Nice. That's a hit. How much damage? Four. Five. Ooh, nice. Five points of damage rips straight over Jurgen's shoulder and kares into his friend's shoulder. Whose name I've already forgotten. I think it was like Slap. Yeah. I thought it was slap.

    Robert: Yeah. That's our boy's slap. Everybody knows Slap. He's

    Star Master Jeff: dead, Mrs.

    Star Master Jeff: He's dead. It doesn't matter. Yeah. Mr. Slap crumple to the ground dead. Both Jurgen and Slap are no more. Meanwhile, Hailey's bleeding out and Thorn is looking very bad.

    Robert: I haven't had some, uh, serious PTSD in my day. I run over to Hailey with one. Why I mean two why's as quick as I can hit her with a Lazarus.

    Robert: Pat

    Star Master Jeff: Robert, as you run up to Haley, [00:29:00] her very similar facial features with her sister are giving you crazy flashback. To the very campaign that ended Haley with One Wise Life. You're moving through the jungles on rxi, the bombs, the rattle of the laser fire. You find her. She's rolled under a bush, wounded trying to crawl her way out, yelling that she needs to get back to her compatriots.

    Star Master Jeff: She needs to defend the line. You carefully push her back under the bush, cover her up with your own body, and start to pull out Lazarus packs applying one after another until you've exhausted your full supply.

    Star Master Jeff: It is only when you've applied the very last one. Now you realize that she's been dead for minutes.

    Robert: You are not dying on me. Hailey. You're not gonna do it. You can get back to your family. You can do it. You can do it one more [00:30:00] time. One more,

    Haleyy: one more. I can hear you. Robert

    Star Master Jeff: Haley. You feel like you're being pulled up. From the dregs of the deepest sleep you've ever been in your eyes flutter open and you're looking up at the steel gray sky of a foreign world broken up by the strident lines of the architecture of derelict skyscrapers.

    Star Master Jeff: You can see Robert to your left, but more importantly, a few scant feet away. You can see that thorn lie, bleeding and gasping on the ground.

    Robert: Haley, I thought I lost you again.

    Haleyy: It's okay, Robert. I'll be here with you every step of the way. Just gonna stop rushing into fights.

    Robert: No, I love that shit. Get up in there.

    Haleyy: Oh God. Okay.

    Felix: I would like to try to just stabilize Thorn using just [00:31:00] basic medical skills and my own intelligence.

    Star Master Jeff: Okay. Absolutely. So Felix. You don't have a flashback and none of this is traumatizing for you because these are just meat bags.

    Felix: Ah, or damnit. Need you for this mission, buddy. I step out at Neil over Thorn.

    Felix: I look, look at the, the burn wound where the laser hit him and I see if I can stem the damage so that he could be back among the living.

    Thorne: Oh man. It's at 11 baby. Oh, oh God. Felix, what the, oh, that guy shot me.

    Felix: Yeah, thorny. You'll be okay.

    Thorne: Told me someone shot him back. Robert got him good? Yes, sir. Okay. Just gimme a minute and then I just kinda collapsed back down against this car that I'm up against.

    Felix: Guys, we are in a real tight spot. I'm not gonna lie. We need some kind of drugs or something. Yeah.

    Robert: Felix, was there anything on the mat?

    Felix: Hold on, let's check these bad boys. They might have some kind of stimulant or something that's gonna help our comrades get back on their [00:32:00] feet.

    Star Master Jeff: Felix, you go over and you give a thorough search of the two bodies.

    Star Master Jeff: You find that each one of them has a laser rifle as well as an advanced knife. They take the form of shock knives, and their armor is all like gang affiliate type armor, just like you saw on very four. It's cobbled together from various pieces of armor and refuse and spray painted and made to look like a uniform in their case, but ultimately is a collection of junk.

    Robert: Now y'all, we do not want to leave these bodies sitting up in here in the street. Have a talent for putting on armors and becoming a disguise for of a gang. Yes,

    Felix: yes. Disguise this, but can we focus on the task at hand?

    Star Master Jeff: Felix, you also find 107 credits between the two of them.

    Felix: But those in my pocket.

    Star Master Jeff: Do you tell your crew at all?

    Star Master Jeff: We'll

    Felix: see.

    Star Master Jeff: I need Robert to roll a notice int. No one else because the [00:33:00] other two people are too wounded to notice that sort of thing. But Robert, with a nine, you do see Felix. Well actually Felix, since you're trying to do it without being seen, I'm gonna give you a chance to slyly pocket that stuff. Go ahead and roll.

    Star Master Jeff: Sneak decks. It's a six. Okay, so Robert won it by three. So Robert, you notice Felix attempting to slyly pocket a. Object that he's collected from each of the two dead bodies.

    Robert: Now, as Felix is actually, you know, my brother from another mother, I mean, we know each other from back in the day. I let him do it.

    Star Master Jeff: That's sweet little guy that's touching. Anyway, so Thorn and Hailey are bleeding out on the ground while you steal money from under their noses and Robert, lift it happen.

    Felix: I never said I was stealing. I said I would divvy it up later, maybe.

    Star Master Jeff: So you've searched the bodies thoroughly and you feel like you've found everything that's on them.

    Felix: No medical supplies, nothing like that. Just the shitty guns and [00:34:00] armor. Some spare credits. All right. I'm gonna check on my map. Let's see if there's any kind of like doctor's office or hospital nearby. Maybe there's still some supplies left. Hold on. Lemme see

    Star Master Jeff: nothing nearby. There are hospitals on the map, but they're not near the spaceport.

    Star Master Jeff: Several clicks away.

    Felix: All right. Hailey, you said you had had some stuff on the ship?

    Haleyy: Yeah, back on the ship.

    Felix: Alright, Robert, dump those bodies.

    Robert: I mean, I'm gonna take 'em with us. Uh, can, can, can y'all, I got one. Can y'all drag one? Uh, and, uh, yeah, let's, let's, uh, let's try not to leave a blood trail, if you don't mind.

    Star Master Jeff: Okay. So the four of you take the two bodies with you. I'm not gonna question why. And that's a decision that I'm personally making to not question my group why they're moving dead bodies around.

    Felix: I don't know why Robert's doing it either, but I'm just. Yeah,

    Star Master Jeff: and I think that's fair and I don't think I want to know from my own sanity and so that I can sleep tonight.

    Thorne: Felix. Felix, my friend, [00:35:00] tell me you looted their bodies.

    Felix: Oh yeah.

    Thorne: Apparently we're bringing them with us too. Oh,

    Robert: kinda look

    Thorne: that Felix and Robert is a bit confused.

    Robert: Okay. Y'all, lemme tell you, you do not want a whole bunch of random bodies found in the street. Want know what that's gonna cause? It's gonna cause a search.

    Robert: Let's get back to the ship. We need some time, Robert.

    Felix: Yeah, I get it. But like, we could have just put them in a, in a building or a car. Bring them with us. Jesus Christ. These guys in

    Thorne: Robert. Robert, I don't wanna be caught with dead bodies in my ship. I'm not going back to prison. You're just bringing the ev with us that we killed these guys.

    Robert: You're probably not wrong. I did see a whole bunch of trash on away here, including a couple of dumpsters. We probably could have dumped these about a half mile back.

    Felix: Oh

    Star Master Jeff: my

    Felix: God.

    Star Master Jeff: So you drag them, just to be clear, you're dragging them into the space port and all the way to the scapegoat. When Robert

    Felix: says that, I just [00:36:00] ilop my guy down.

    Felix: I, I'm, I'm alright then. I'm done. Robert, where can we put these somewhere else?

    Robert: Can we make cute mannequin out of it so that like, just

    Felix: go, look, look, oh my God, over there. Look. Abandoned car over there. Shove him in there.

    Star Master Jeff: I guess the question is, who put Robert in charge for a whole half mile of hiking?

    Felix: Yeah. Sometimes in a crisis situation, you just go along with what a confident person says.

    Thorne: Yeah, I'm in extreme pain. I I wasn't paying attention.

    Haleyy: Yeah. Haley's out of it. Who?

    Robert: I'm shitting myself over here that you guys actually did it.

    Star Master Jeff: So what do you do with these bodies? Are you putting them into the space port or are you dropping them off in the dumpster?

    Star Master Jeff: No, no.

    Felix: Yeah, we're dropping 'em off after we realized that there's no reason for us to be carting them.

    Robert: We found a random car and I positioned them like they were driving down the road in the car. Clever,

    Star Master Jeff: very inconspicuous. So I'm assuming everyone plays along and helps. Robert, who in a previous, just a few weeks ago, was rolling around on a [00:37:00] space station to cover himself in Greece.

    Star Master Jeff: You all help him prop up these two bodies like puppets to make them look like they're driving a car so that he can feel better about his scenario?

    Thorne: No. You're, you're upbringing falsehoods right now.

    Felix: I hoist mine into the backseat and flop it along, and then whatever he wants to do with it, he can do with it.

    Felix: Yeah. I'm

    Thorne: not, I'm not

    Felix: helping. Yeah,

    Robert: after spending like a little bit longer than I'm proud of trying to prop it up and make it look like it drives the head, kept on doing something funny. Let's just put 'em in the trunk real quick.

    Star Master Jeff: So Robert, I'm pretty sure at this point you're working alone. Yep. As you rally the troops, Robert, you yourself do all of the work and move both of the bodies into the trunk.

    Star Master Jeff: I'm okay with that. And then the four of you move into the spaceport and you make your way to your docking bay. But as you approach. You hear voices

    Thorne: and when you make out what they're saying from a distance,

    Star Master Jeff: you just hear a couple commanding voices talking and then you hear some laughter and then you hear [00:38:00] some orders being shouted.

    Star Master Jeff: But nothing that you can quite make out. Are these

    Felix: voices outside of our landing bay, these from inside of our landing bay?

    Star Master Jeff: Yes. The voices are definitely emanating from your landing bay, which is about 50 feet in front of you. You're walking down the main concourse right now, making your way to docking Bay 26.

    Star Master Jeff: Damnit,

    Thorne: somebody else here. Someone can sneak up and get a good look. See if you can see who they are without getting noticed.

    Felix: Yeah, that's not gonna be me. I move my legs and they creak a little bit. Every time I pick 'em up, the gear is churning in them. These bad boys haven't been oiled in a while.

    Robert: Having just gotten back from, uh, stashing bodies in a car, I look around, it goes, nose goes.

    Star Master Jeff: If it's nose goes, everyone roll decks. Lowest roll goes.

    Felix: Hold on. The one at Felix are the rational ones here. I think that represents us not putting our fingers on our noses and just looking at each other

    Star Master Jeff: as the game master. I insist that you rolled excavated. No, I'm just kidding.

    Thorne: Alright, fine. You guys wait here.

    Thorne: Thanks Thorn.

    Star Master Jeff: Aren't you seriously [00:39:00] wounded? Thorn.

    Thorne: I mean, I am seriously wounded, but as long as I don't take any damage, then I'm okay. Gimme a sneak deck, thorn. It's pretty bad. Cool. I would like to use my expert ability to, uh, once proceed, re-roll that. Okay.

    Star Master Jeff: With a four, you should consider doing that slightly better.

    Star Master Jeff: Okay. So with a six, you carefully creep up to docking Bay 26 where you can hear the voices coming from. As you get closer, you can start to hear the voices saying like. Yeah, I, uh, I thought I saw the metal on the street. Yeah, I think Ian was talking to them. I'm sure everything's fine. Yeah. Boss, I, uh, I can't kick this door open.

    Star Master Jeff: I'm trying to get this door open still. Hey, keep working on it, buddy. Okay. You can get that door open. Okay. I'll keep working, boss. I'll keep trying. Can you hear the sounds of a blow torch? Keep bit of hammering. And that's like that,

    Thorne: that noise is coming from our ship, right? They're trying to get into our ship.

    Star Master Jeff: The noise is coming from that docking bay. Yes. Uh, you've reached the corner. [00:40:00] Would you like to peek around or is that too much for you? You can go real quick. Whoop, whoop. Just, yeah, I get a peek. Okay. You quickly go like, haha and you throw your head out and pull it back.

    Thorne: Yeah.

    Star Master Jeff: Go ahead and roll. Notice int it's less than a second of what I like to call I Time, time that the, I has used to look upon something and, Ooh, a 10.

    Star Master Jeff: Good. Roll. Okay. So with a total time eye time, as I like to say, of 500 milliseconds, you get a quick rah and you look around the corner and you pull your head back. You see three people, two of them are at the front of your ship and another one is standing off to the side. You know that there has to be at least a fourth one that's in the back.

    Star Master Jeff: Working on the hatch, unless that third one that you saw is the one that was working on the hatch. They're also wearing all the accoutrements of guardians of the great work just like you are getting slept.

    Thorne: Okay. I will take that [00:41:00] information and I will make my way back towards where my friends are waiting.

    Thorne: All right. It's not good news. It seems like it's more of those. Clowns that we ran into. They specifically mentioned that Jorgen character by name, and it looks like they're trying to break into our ship, and they're definitely setting a trap for when we come back to it. We're gonna have a problem.

    Thorne: There's three, maybe four of 'em. They don't look friendly and I don't know how much longer it's gonna take, but they got tools. They're probably gonna get into our ship, so I hope you guys didn't leave all your credits in there or something like that. If we're gonna arrest and recuperate, it's not gonna be there, or at least it's not gonna be there right now.

    Robert: How, uh, secure is our ship? Uh, uh, they, they ain't gonna be able to get in there, are they?

    Thorne: They could definitely get in there, my friend. It's uh, it's blowtorch resistant, but it is not blowtorch immune. Unless the two of you muscle heads think you can take out four guys without getting noticed. I don't think we're getting back to our ship anytime soon.

    Felix: I don't know. I mean, Hailey, correct me if I'm wrong, but you don't like, you [00:42:00] look like you're in much shape to take anybody on right now.

    Haleyy: I can certainly try to land a shot.

    Felix: What about this? Like, we could try to make our way to OmniCorp, see if there's any help that we can get there.

    Robert: I mean, I think that, uh, this is for a, a four person combat at least.

    Robert: Um, when they have the drop on us, that's gonna be dangerous. We could, we could risk it, but it is indeed risky. We might wanna hit one of them hospitals. We might want to just go straight to the dock.

    Thorne: And what do we do if we get back and the goat is missing or disabled?

    Felix: Well, we'll find another solution, man.

    Felix: But like what are we gonna do right now?

    Thorne: I

    Felix: think live. Alright, well we're not gonna get in the ship now. I think we should keep on with our current mission. See if we can get some help from Omnitech. Let's make our way over to RAA four and then we'll come back and God willing to, scapegoat will still be here.

    Star Master Jeff: So the plan is set. You'll be going to Estrada four. You exchange glances and the final decision is made. You cannot go back to your [00:43:00] ship when it's under guard It. At least not in your current condition of two severely wounded members. There's no way forward here, at least not yet. And with that, our story will continue at a later date.

    Star Master Jeff: Well, that's it for tonight, but before we go, let's take a moment and hear the thoughts and feelings of our crew about tonight's adventure.

    Thorne: Boy, I sure do hope that they have some sort of medical supplies at this Omnitech base because, man, if I could make a recommendation. Don't get shot, not recommended.

    Thorne: One star,

    Felix: you know, I'm a lot better with machines than I am humans, but I somehow managed to keep thorn put together for a little while at least. And then I, I don't get that Robert Guy moving bodies around trying, talking about the skies while we're trying to save lives, man, you know? But he's good to fight.

    Felix: He's good to fight. I hope Omni Tech has what we need so we can keep going,

    Haleyy: you know. I knew I was prepared as I got ready to go on these tough remissions, but man, [00:44:00] I'm really gonna have to change up how I do things. I'm pretty shaken up from that. Being still pretty shaken up. Being on the brink of death and seeing Robert's face is, you know, the second time he's watched one of his die, like pretty hard.

    Robert: Well, I'm gonna tell you, I'm real glad we are on. Wa, FEA because God, that ship was starting to smell horrible. I mean, sweet Jesus. Finally we're outta space. I thought soldiers smelled bad. Now I'm gonna tell you, I real hope, really hope we keep the goat. Ooh, loving the goat so far, said for the smell, but then outta nowhere.

    Robert: I surprised motherfucker. Mm. Did not like that, Hailey. Ooh, God. I thought I lost you again. I'm okay. I'm okay. Y'all don't you worry. I'm okay.

    Star Master Jeff: Thanks for joining us everyone. This has been another adventure of

    Everyone: dark.

    Thorne: [00:45:00] Maybe try that one more time. Was that, oh, that not perfect. I thought it was.

Jeff M. Demers

Software Engineer, Author, and Forever DM

https://www.darkstaradventures.com
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Episode 2: It’s Just a Prank!